Tuesday 22 September 2015

Terrible Risky Mistakes Men Make in their marriage


 
Despite the best intentions of married men in their homes, these habits may undermine their relationships.
 Men don’t nag, but you may be making mistakes that risk ruining your marriage.In fact, if you are a typical man and not a mature real man with plans, you are likely making several and making them often.

 1. Not showing empathy.
What is empathy? It is the ability to recognize and share someone else’s feelings.It is the most important part of any relationship. And it’s something that, in general, women are better at than men.Women want their feelings to be understood and validated.If your wife tells you she feels ignored, for example, at that moment what she wants is for you to understand her feelings rather than talk about the facts.

 2. Reckless spending.
 Making big purchases such as buying a car without first consulting your wife is a big mistake. Consciously or unconsciously, men frequently assign themselves the leadership role in the relationship. That, too, is a mistake because A couple’s relationship involves shared leadership.sometimes,you need to discuss issues with your wife before concluding.

3. Being sexually selfish -- or clueless.
 In the bedroom, some men forget or, worse, haven’t figured out that their wives often need more than they do to get turned on.Affection, making her feel loved and needed,that’s basic for her to feel aroused,Older men usually catch on, but young men are especially unaware of this.Men perceive sex as a sufficient means of being close, of having a connection But women want a connection prior to having sex.

 4. Listening the wrong way.
 Listening does not mean nodding along as your wife explains what is bothering her and you, all the while, are thinking up ways to fix the problem.Men tend to analyze situations and generate options,and That’s guaranteed to make your wife go ballistic.

5. Shelving your feelings.
Listening to your wife talk about her feelings is essential. So is talking about your own.
Many men, however, think they need to hide their feelings or risk being seen as weak. That’s a mistake because not sharing your emotions can be a danger signal for your wife.

6. Going on a power trip.
 Being a man does not mean being in charge,but many men don’t get that.They try to get what they want by being dominant. But it’s not about making demands or trying to overpower her. Women will pull away from that.power position that men often put themselves in essentially negates the relationship, which must be reciprocal, supportive, and caring because Our best selves emerge in the context of our relationships with others and not as an independent entity,

Segun obadeyi
coinofgold82xxx@yahoo.com

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THE TIME IS NOW:IMPEACHMENT IS INEVITABLE



Nigeria in some time past, so many of our politicians thinks they are above the law, therefore doing all sort criminal act, looting of public funds, and making their personal ambitions more important to them than the blood of the citizen.

After being Summoned to appear before the Code of Conduct Tribunal(CCT) in the investigation of some baffling inconsistencies in his declaration of assets, he refuse, dismisses the charges as false and frivolous, awards himself an acquittal, and seeks a court to block the Tribunal’s proceedings.

If found guilty as charged,Saraki risks removal from the Senate. A long and painful trial could be in the offing. That, of course, is what his set of enemies,many of them,within his own party, the All Progressives Congress had long wished for since June 9, when Saraki pulled the rug from under the party,with the support of the Peoples Democratic Party senators,to emerged as President of the eighth Senate.

Apart from saraki issue being political, If all of his asset have been acquired in a more truthful and just manner there's no need of hiding his asset, most of these politicians have robbed the nation,yet hide under political party to cover their shame. It will be better for the senate president to resign peacefully before the tribunal helps in forfeiting his seat has the senate leader.

Today judgement in the tribunal will determine if our judiciary is of the standard required, saraki must face the law With no form of partiality, this must serve as a lesson to all other politicians who have diverted public funds to their account.

As all nigerians are waiting for the outcome today, I urge all nigerians to support the fight against corruption.
God bless Nigeria

 dagre8owolabi@yahoo.com
Owolabi marvellous
  08156715876

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COUNTRY FIRST II


Image result for Prof Chris Nwaokobia Jnr
"A nation that ignores her children will suffer spiritual atrophy; a leadership that ignores the young condemns the future to an era of inexperience; and a ruling class that ignores the youth plans to fail. Nations are the aggregation of every social strata, to succeed it must be about Country, about the people not about personal egos and ids." - Prof Chris Nwaokobia Jnr.

I read that 50 Senators want the Senate President to stay on, they are urging and nudging him on, they argue that the goings on at the CCT is a witch hunt, so Saraki can flaunt and disobey the Laws of the Land. Sad!

He can undermine Court summons, he goes to the Court of Appeal to vacate an Order of the Code of Conduct Tribunal, gets a NO from the Court of Appeal alas unknown to him the times have CHANGED. Sadly, Lawmakers have become Law-breakers.

Some defend this because they consider the process a witch hunt. Wait a minute, is the witch hunt or ghost hunt responsible for the anticipatory declaration of properties that were not owned by Bukola Saraki as his? Was the witch hunt responsible for the corruption for which he is charged? Was the witch hunt the reason the House Rules were forged? If his hands are clean would there be a charge? Why is he scared of the Legal Process?

This generation must cease to applaud the political games of politicians and raise our collective moral margin. Witch hunt or manhunt, it must be COUNTRY FIRST, let Saraki resign  so he can face the Courts and tackle those witch-hunting him, governance must not suffer because he must remain Senate President, and by the way the integrity of this Senate is on a nose dive.

God Save Nigeria.

Prof. Chris Nwaokobia Jnr.
DG CHANGE AMBASSADORS OF NIGERIA CAN.
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THE FALL OF THE FIRST LADY



A great king once lived several centuries ago. His name was Ahasuerus, the great emperor who reigned over the Kingdoms of Persia and Media - the then world powers. The domain of this mighty King cut across the borders of many nations and tribes, having subdued one hundred and twenty-seven provinces of various kingdoms by his unrivalled military might and great political power. With unquestionable authority and supremacy, King Ahasuerus ruled majestically from Shushan the citadel.

King Ahasuerus’ awesome greatness was attested to by his decision to make a feast for his officials, servants, nobles, governors, princes from one hundred and twenty-seven provinces and every one that lived in Shushan, the capital city. The feast was the first and the last of its kind! It lasted for one hundred and eighty days! Imagine half a year of wining, dining, merry making and total holiday for a whole nation! Drinks were served in golden cups; foods were served in silver plates; the venue was heavily decorated with expensive fine linen, marbles and precious stones such as turquoise, gems and onyx. Such were the greatness and riches of Emperor Ahasuerus’ kingdom!

To crown this majestic event, King Ahasuerus wanted his wife - Her Majesty, Queen Vashti to impress his many guests with her beauty and splendour. The first lady was indeed beautiful to behold! Her charming look and captivating frame singled her out of all that dwelt in the kingdom; she was beauty personified! The King, apparently proud of Queen Vashti, wanted her to showcase her beauty before the seated guests in order to earn himself glory, respect and honour, so he sent for her. Surprisingly, Her Majesty Queen Vashti turned down the call of the King. She was not ready to come as the king commanded; she made light the order of her husband.

Queen Vashti’s refusal to come to the feast at the King’s order was a big slap on his face. The First Lady’s gross disrespect for King Ahasuerus became known to thousands of guests present at the feast. The disrepute, shame and contempt the King suffered as a result was enormous, to say the least! Her Majesty’s refusal of the King’s order suggested that though King Ahasuerus was a great Emperor who ruled the then world, yet he was not in control in his own home! The Queen’s contemptible act established that the honour, respect and reverence accorded the King by all nations, were far from his reach under his own roof! King Ahasuerus became disdained in the eyes of all that were present at the feast and in the capital city - Shushan. How sad!

Why did Her Majesty, Queen Vashti refused the King’s call? Why did she decide to bring her highly placed husband to contempt before the whole nation? Here is a clue!

‘ALSO Vashti the Queen made a feast for the women in the royal house which belonged to King Ahasuerus’ Esther 1:9;

It is apparent that Queen Vashti was busy with ‘her own feast’. She was not part of her husband’s feast; she also made her own feast for the women in the royal house. She must have been greatly engrossed in her own feast that she had no time to spare to answer the call of her husband the great King, who being proud of her, wanted to show-case her beauty to all present at the feast. She had her own aspiration, vision and pursuit separate from her husband’s, so she ran her own feast concurrently!

Why did Queen Vashti run her own feast when the King’s feast was supposed to be for everyone? It appears that Her Majesty also wanted to do something she could call her own; she needed recognition and self actualization as we call it nowadays; she was not readily available to run with the vision of her husband, so she didn’t see any reason being part of the King’s feast. Of course, in the midst of the women for whom she made her own feast, she was the greatest. She would have all the recognition that she had always desired for herself.

Somebody might want to give in to an assumption that separation of women from men folks during feasts was traditional to the Persian’s culture hence justification for Queen Vashti’s separate feast, but there seems to be no proof for this assumption. Her Majesty’s drive to run a separate feast for the women was born out of her own burning desire to do ‘her own thing’ even if her husband –the King would be brought to disrepute in the process.

As a result of this condemnable act, Queen Vashti was dethroned and replaced at the commandment of the King. Her position was subsequently given to Esther. We can imagine how Queen Vashti, the once respected First Lady would possibly end her life following humiliation out of the palace. No matter what her justification was for 'doing her own thing', nothing could save her.

The fall of Queen Vashti brings to light great truths about God’s order for the home. It is not surprising that Queen Vashti was dethroned and replaced; her action constituted a gross violation of God’s order. God’s order is that a wife must be an integral part and parcel of her husband’s God’s-given vision and pursuits. The fulfillment of a woman is complete only when she has found her place in the vision that God committed to her husband and run together with him. A wife that is not willing and prepared to identify herself with the vision and aspiration of her husband in all things is violating God’s order.

It must be emphasized that God did not create woman to be subservient to man in anyway; both man and woman were created in the image of God as co-regents according to Genesis 1:26-28. However, woman was never designed or made independently of man. Just like the church can never imagine being independent of Christ in anything, so also is a wife in relationship with her husband. She must be identified with her husband in all things.

It does not matter what the world teaches or encourages, the order of God cannot be changed. In the name of women emancipation and self actualization crusades in every quarter, a lot of women have neglected their God-ordained vital roles in the visions and aspirations of their husbands. I am not a proponent of male chauvinism in any way and would never approve of culture or traditions that attempt to reduce women to a sort of second-rated citizens or slaves. As long as a woman integrates herself into God-given calling, vision, aspiration, and pursuits of her husband, she will always know fulfillment and excitement. Remember God created Eve from one of the rib bones of Adam which suggest that she came out of man and she must always find her rightful place in the man’s life.

Ezekiel Olukolajo
olukolajoezekieloluseun@yahoo.com



Shalom.


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And Moses sware on that day, saying, Surely the land whereon thy feet have trodden shall be thine inheritance, and thy children’s for ever, because thou hast wholly followed the LORD my God. And now, behold, the LORD hath kept me alive, as he said, these forty and five years, even since the LORD spake this word unto Moses, while the children of Israel wandered in the wilderness: and now, lo, I am this day fourscore and five years old. As yet I am as strong this day as I was in the day that Moses sent me: as my strength was then, even so is my strength now, for war, both to go out, and to come in. Now therefore give me this mountain, whereof the LORD spake in that day; for thou heardest in that day how the Anakims were there, and that the cities were great and fenced: if so be the LORD will be with me, then I shall be able to drive them out, as the LORD said. And Joshua blessed him, and gave unto Caleb the son of Jephunneh Hebron for an inheritance. Joshua 14:9-13;
By way of inheritance, God’s children have become bonafide owners of all good things of life. The birthright that comes with new life in Christ has conferred on God’s children, the right to own and enjoy everything that belongs to God their father! To have an idea of the great possessions within your reach as a child of God, the best angle is to consider the limitlessness of the power, wisdom, glory, majesty, dominion and riches of the Almighty God. Of course God’s possessions and riches have no limits, no boundaries, no beginning, and no ending! As God’s son, nothing less is expected of you because you are a partaker of His divine nature and grace. The scripture in 2 Peter 1:3 says that God ‘According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue’. With this declaration, it’s clear that God had already given you all things; what is expected of you is to possess your possessions. However, considering the situation of many of God’s children, it is extremely sad to see majority living like servants as though they own nothing, whereas God’s word says all things belong to them. This certainly is not God’s fault!
It is absolutely true that all things have been given to you as God’s child, but it is critical you understand how to possess those things which God has freely given to you as inheritance, otherwise, there’s no way you will enjoy or live the life expected of you as a son. To possess your possessions, the first key is that you must take practical steps to claim those things which God says belong to you. A lot of people usually make the mistake of thinking that their possessions will come to them on a platter of Gold with no efforts on their part, how wrong! At the time God gave the Promised Land to the children of Israel, it was not a vacant land; in fact the land was fully occupied by the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Jebusites, and the Girgashites who were the original owners and occupiers. To take actual possession of the land, the children of Israel firmly stood their ground, fought and claimed that which God had declared to be their inheritance by prevailing against and displacing the Canaanites. You also can have all good things of life which God says are your inheritance as long as you are prepared to take practical steps to possess them.
Another vital key you require to possess your possessions is knowledge. Hosea 4:6A says ‘My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge’. Without adequate knowledge of what Christ has done for you, you can’t help being deprived, you may spend the rest of your life not enjoying those things which have been freely given to you. The scripture in Obadiah 1:17 says ‘But upon mount Zion shall be deliverance, and there shall be holiness; and the house of Jacob shall possess their possessions’. From this scripture, it’s obvious that you cannot possess your possessions until you’re delivered. The great deliverance you require to possess your possessions is deliverance from bondage of ignorance. It will be extremely difficult for you to possess those things which are legitimately yours if you’re not even aware they belong to you in the first place! The reason a lot of God’s children are being plagued by sickness and diseases is not because healing is unavailable; the reason majority of God’s children are wallowing in poverty is not because prosperity is inaccessible; the reason many of God’s children are not enjoying victory over their enemies is not because Christ has not overcome the enemies, the reason is simply because they are ignorant of their inheritance through Christ. To be free from the bondage of ignorance, you must actively seek for knowledge through reading, studying and meditating on the word of God. In addition to these, you must also be sensitive to your environment to know when opportunities are presenting themselves. What do you do with the information at your disposal? It is not enough to have information; information must lead to transformation of your situation!
Finally, to possess your possessions you must never give up. The problem with most of us is that we give up too quickly. It does not matter the situation or circumstance, you will surely hit breakthrough if you refuse to give up. In the above passage for instance, Joshua, at eighty-five (85) years did not give up nor become lazy in claiming his possession of the land given to him forty-five (45) years earlier. If Joshua did not give up even for the reason of age, but led a troop of soldiers against the giants –sons of Anakim to possess Hebron what’s your excuse? If Joshua did not retire at eighty-five to sit back and accept the situation, but pushed himself forward to action and received heaven’s backing, what’s your excuse? God does not waste His grace on those who have decided to give up, it was when God saw the courageous heart of Joshua to press on and possess the land of his inheritance that He released divine strength that helped him in the battle. Dearly beloved, don’t give up, you too like Joshua can say ‘give me this mountain’. Move on, don’t stop, anywhere you step with the soles of your feet has been given to you – possess your possessions!
Ezekiel Olukolajo is a Ezekiel is an Insurance practitioner by profession and a teacher of the word by calling. He also serves as a resident Pastor in an Evangelical Church. Ezekiel can be reached at: olukolajoezekieloluseun@yahoo.com.
- See more at: http://www.mannaexpressonline.com/practical-steps-to-possess-your-possession/#sthash.UfgsAhIl.dpuf
And Moses sware on that day, saying, Surely the land whereon thy feet have trodden shall be thine inheritance, and thy children’s for ever, because thou hast wholly followed the LORD my God. And now, behold, the LORD hath kept me alive, as he said, these forty and five years, even since the LORD spake this word unto Moses, while the children of Israel wandered in the wilderness: and now, lo, I am this day fourscore and five years old. As yet I am as strong this day as I was in the day that Moses sent me: as my strength was then, even so is my strength now, for war, both to go out, and to come in. Now therefore give me this mountain, whereof the LORD spake in that day; for thou heardest in that day how the Anakims were there, and that the cities were great and fenced: if so be the LORD will be with me, then I shall be able to drive them out, as the LORD said. And Joshua blessed him, and gave unto Caleb the son of Jephunneh Hebron for an inheritance. Joshua 14:9-13;
By way of inheritance, God’s children have become bonafide owners of all good things of life. The birthright that comes with new life in Christ has conferred on God’s children, the right to own and enjoy everything that belongs to God their father! To have an idea of the great possessions within your reach as a child of God, the best angle is to consider the limitlessness of the power, wisdom, glory, majesty, dominion and riches of the Almighty God. Of course God’s possessions and riches have no limits, no boundaries, no beginning, and no ending! As God’s son, nothing less is expected of you because you are a partaker of His divine nature and grace. The scripture in 2 Peter 1:3 says that God ‘According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue’. With this declaration, it’s clear that God had already given you all things; what is expected of you is to possess your possessions. However, considering the situation of many of God’s children, it is extremely sad to see majority living like servants as though they own nothing, whereas God’s word says all things belong to them. This certainly is not God’s fault!
It is absolutely true that all things have been given to you as God’s child, but it is critical you understand how to possess those things which God has freely given to you as inheritance, otherwise, there’s no way you will enjoy or live the life expected of you as a son. To possess your possessions, the first key is that you must take practical steps to claim those things which God says belong to you. A lot of people usually make the mistake of thinking that their possessions will come to them on a platter of Gold with no efforts on their part, how wrong! At the time God gave the Promised Land to the children of Israel, it was not a vacant land; in fact the land was fully occupied by the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Jebusites, and the Girgashites who were the original owners and occupiers. To take actual possession of the land, the children of Israel firmly stood their ground, fought and claimed that which God had declared to be their inheritance by prevailing against and displacing the Canaanites. You also can have all good things of life which God says are your inheritance as long as you are prepared to take practical steps to possess them.
Another vital key you require to possess your possessions is knowledge. Hosea 4:6A says ‘My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge’. Without adequate knowledge of what Christ has done for you, you can’t help being deprived, you may spend the rest of your life not enjoying those things which have been freely given to you. The scripture in Obadiah 1:17 says ‘But upon mount Zion shall be deliverance, and there shall be holiness; and the house of Jacob shall possess their possessions’. From this scripture, it’s obvious that you cannot possess your possessions until you’re delivered. The great deliverance you require to possess your possessions is deliverance from bondage of ignorance. It will be extremely difficult for you to possess those things which are legitimately yours if you’re not even aware they belong to you in the first place! The reason a lot of God’s children are being plagued by sickness and diseases is not because healing is unavailable; the reason majority of God’s children are wallowing in poverty is not because prosperity is inaccessible; the reason many of God’s children are not enjoying victory over their enemies is not because Christ has not overcome the enemies, the reason is simply because they are ignorant of their inheritance through Christ. To be free from the bondage of ignorance, you must actively seek for knowledge through reading, studying and meditating on the word of God. In addition to these, you must also be sensitive to your environment to know when opportunities are presenting themselves. What do you do with the information at your disposal? It is not enough to have information; information must lead to transformation of your situation!
Finally, to possess your possessions you must never give up. The problem with most of us is that we give up too quickly. It does not matter the situation or circumstance, you will surely hit breakthrough if you refuse to give up. In the above passage for instance, Joshua, at eighty-five (85) years did not give up nor become lazy in claiming his possession of the land given to him forty-five (45) years earlier. If Joshua did not give up even for the reason of age, but led a troop of soldiers against the giants –sons of Anakim to possess Hebron what’s your excuse? If Joshua did not retire at eighty-five to sit back and accept the situation, but pushed himself forward to action and received heaven’s backing, what’s your excuse? God does not waste His grace on those who have decided to give up, it was when God saw the courageous heart of Joshua to press on and possess the land of his inheritance that He released divine strength that helped him in the battle. Dearly beloved, don’t give up, you too like Joshua can say ‘give me this mountain’. Move on, don’t stop, anywhere you step with the soles of your feet has been given to you – possess your possessions!
Ezekiel Olukolajo is a Ezekiel is an Insurance practitioner by profession and a teacher of the word by calling. He also serves as a resident Pastor in an Evangelical Church. Ezekiel can be reached at: olukolajoezekieloluseun@yahoo.com.
- See more at: http://www.mannaexpressonline.com/practical-steps-to-possess-your-possession/#sthash.UfgsAhIl.dpuf