Everybody makes mistakes—that’s a given fact but not everyone learns from
them. Some people make the same mistakes over and over again, fail to
make any real progress, and can’t figure out why.
When we make mistakes, it can be hard to admit them because doing so
feels like an attack on our self-worth. This tendency poses a huge
problem because new research proves something that commonsense has told
us for a very long time—fully acknowledging and embracing errors is the
only way to avoid repeating them.
Yet, many of us still struggle with this.
Some mistakes are so tempting that we all make them at one point or
another. Smart people learn from these mistakes and never make them
twice.
Believing in someone or something that’s too good to be true
Some
people are so charismatic and so confident that it can be tempting to
follow anything they say. They speak endlessly of how successful their
lives and businesses are, how well liked they are, who they know, and how many
opportunities they can offer you. While it’s, of course, true that some
people really are successful and really want to help you, smart people
only need to be tricked once before they start to think twice about a
deal that sounds too good to be true. The results of naivety and a lack
of due diligence can be catastrophic. Smart people ask serious questions
before getting involved because they realize that no one, themselves
included, are as good as they look.
Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result
Albert
Einstein said that insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a
different result. Despite his popularity and cutting insight, there are a
lot of people who seem determined that two plus two will eventually
equal five. Smart people, on the other hand, need only experience this
frustration once. The fact is simple: if you keep the same approach,
you’ll keep getting the same results, no matter how much you hope for
the opposite. Smart people know that if they want a different result,
they need to change their approach, even when it’s painful to do so.
Operating without a budget
You can’t
experience financial freedom until you operate under the constraint of a
budget. Sticking to a budget, personally and professionally, forces us
to make thoughtful choices about what we want and need. Smart people
only have to face that insurmountable pile of bills once before getting
their act together, starting with a thorough reckoning as to where their
money is going. They realize that once you understand how much you’re
spending and what you’re spending it on, the right choices become clear.
Losing sight of the big picture
It’s so easy
to become head-down busy, working so hard on what’s right in front of
you that you lose sight of the big picture. But smart people learn how
to keep this in check by weighing their daily priorities against a
carefully calculated goal. It’s not that they don’t care about
small-scale work, they just have the discipline and perspective to
adjust their course as necessary. Life is all about the big picture, and
when you lose sight of it, everything suffers.
Trying to be someone you’re not
It’s
tempting to try to please people by being whom they want you to be, but
no one likes a fake, and trying to be someone you’re not never ends
well. Smart people figure that out the first time they get called out
for being a phony, forget their lines, or drop out of character. Other
people never seem to realize that everyone else can see right through
their act. They don’t recognize the relationships they’ve damaged, the
jobs they’ve lost, and the opportunities they’ve missed as a result of
trying to be someone they’re not. Smart people, on the other hand, make
that connection right away and realize that happiness and success demand
authenticity.
Trying to please everyone
Almost everyone
makes this mistake at some point, but smart people realize quickly that
it’s simply impossible to please everybody and trying to please everyone
pleases no one. Smart people know that in order to be effective, you
have to develop the courage to call the shots and to make the choices
that you feel are right (not the choices that everyone will like).
Written by Travis Bradberry
Travis Bradberry is the Co-author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and President at TalentSmart organization
Pastor Ben Kingsley
Yinka Olawunmi sharing words of wisdom with his viewers