Wisdom hath builded her house, she hath hewn out her seven pillars:
She hath killed her beasts; she hath mingled her wine; she hath also
furnished her table. She hath sent forth her maidens: she crieth upon
the highest places of the city, Whoso is simple, let him turn in hither:
as for him that wanteth understanding, she saith to him Proverbs 9:1-4
(KJV).
To build a great house you need a strong foundation and pillars;
prayer and fasting will never sustain a skyscraper you build without
strong pillars. Likewise, marriage needs to be built on very strong
pillars to make it stand and weather the storm of life, which may come
as wind, flood to test the strength of a home and its stability.
The following resources combine together to make strong pillars for marriage:
1) GODLINESS: Marriage is a godly product. So, it will take a godly
attitude to sustain it. Godliness will make you to love God and his
son/daughter in your life. Godliness involves living like God, living
for God, living in God, living on God, living with God. It involves
Christ likeness, obedient to the word of God and humility. Godliness
connotes godly attitude like love, tolerance, forgiveness, acceptance,
goodness, prayerfulness and friendliness which actually make marriage
work.
2) PRAYER: Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find;
knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh
receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it
shall be opened Matthew 7:7, 8 (KJV). Don‘t be careless with your
marriage, pray about your spouse’s and your own emotion, actions,
reactions, attitudes and characters. Pray against satanic manipulation
of your marital choice. Pray against any evil plan against your
marriage, spouse and children. Insure your marriage daily with prayers.
3) DIVINE DIRECTION: I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way
which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. Be ye not as the
horse, or as the mule, which have no understanding: whose mouth must be
held in with bit and bridle, lest they come near unto thee Psalms 32:8, 9
(KJV). Marriage is like a road to an unknown city; you will need
somebody that knows the way to lead you. Only God knows tomorrow, so
allow him to lead you into it without regrets. Your eyes may see a
beautiful face, but it takes God to show you a beautiful destiny. Don’t
just marry anybody, pray and get direction from God.
4) ADEQUATE PREPARATION: The preparations of the heart in man and the
answer of the tongue, is from the Lord Proverbs 16:1 (KJV). Marriage is
a long time journey; it needs to be adequately prepared for. Don’t rush
into it. Prepare physically, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally
and vocationally. For more on this, get a copy of my book: Preparing for
Marriage.
5) WISDOM: Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding
it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with
all precious and pleasant riches. A wise man is strong; yea, a man of
knowledge increaseth strength Proverbs 24:3-5 (KJV). Marriage doesn’t
work by age, it works by wisdom. Many people are suffering in their
marriage today because they lack the required wisdom for a successful
family life. Get wisdom through marriage programmes, books, CD’s, DVD
and Marriage School.
6) EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION: Speaking to yourselves in psalms and
hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to
the Lord Ephesians 5:19 (KJV). For marriage to last, effective
communication must be in place. This involves truthfulness, sincerity,
openness and clarity. Negative statements like: fool, idiot, stupid, mad
should be avoided. Use: I am sorry. I love you, you are beautiful. All
these positive words will keep your marriage on track.
7) SERVICE: Look not every man on his own things, but every man also
on the things of others Philippians 2:4 (KJV). Successful marriage is a
product of service from two angles. That is, the husband and wife. Those
who go into marriage looking for somebody that will serve them will
make a mess of their marriage in no time. Serve your partner; don’t wait
to be served. Render a helping hand to your spouse at all times even if
he is indifferent.
Bisi Adewale is a family expert and president of college of marital
success; He is an international conference speaker and an author of more
than 52 books on marriage and family life, singles, love, sex and
purity and intimacy. For more info visit www.familybooster.com,
www.bisiadewale.com, or call 08068312004, or send mail to
familybooster@gmail.com