1. Make him a Better Man
I am not saying your husbands are not good men at the first place. But you can always be a positive influence in his life and his bad habits will automatically change. Be an example to him, the example that he himself can follow and be proud to show off to the world. Be the reason our husband would want to change himself, be an optimistic and responsible man. When his friends and relatives appreciate him for the recent changes in him, most of them positive, he should thank you and proudly announce the disclaimer for his revised personality!
2. Contentment is the Key to Happiness
Your husband’s state of mind depends on you to a great extent. It’s your duty, ladies, to keep your husband satisfied in every manner. Keep a healthy environment at home, have good sex, cook good food, be friendly, respect you in-laws, share, discuss and find solution to problems jointly, and your husband will thank the Almighty for gifting him such a mature and understanding better half
3. Be the Best Friend
The best kind of marriage is the one where the couple is best friends and shares every secret from the past and every plans of the future. I myself am in love with my best friend for years and that indeed is the best thing that has happened to me. Now it requires a lot of maturity and you instead of getting angry at some secret your husband shares, be thankful and feel proud that he didn’t hide it from you. This is how a very healthy friendship develops between you two, and once you are best friends with your husband that marriage is gonna rock!
4. Planning a war?
Which marriage does not have fights? In fact, every relationship has fights. They make up for a big part of any successful marriage. But one very important thing is to choose. To choose between fights which are necessary and which are not? Now nobody fights willingly, I agree, but there are topics and issues which are too petty to be fought for. We women have to do that. A harmless hello your husband bids to an old friend after a long time, or unavoidable workload aren’t things you should be fighting for. These fights do no good for your marriage and only pisses off your husband. So the next time you get angry, think twice. The reason for your anger, is it really necessary?
5. Nag? Err.
Now this is one thing in most women that men absolutely hate. Nagging, that is. We understand that after marriage, your husband is the one for you and you share all your grieves, insecurities, problems and demands with him. But ladies, there is a limit to everything. If you have to share or fight with you r husband, night is the time. Or a laid back weekend afternoon, may be. Not immediately after your husband comes home from work or when he is at work. Nobody likes women nagging all the time and this nagging is such a dangerous quality that might even lead to infidelity on the husband’s part. So women, be sensitive and sensible enough.
6. Sharing is Caring
So now we move on to the serious part of a marriage. Communication. It is of utmost importance in any kind of relationship. If you do not communicate on a personal basis, you facts and problems and thoughts are never ever going to reach your husband. And same holds true for him as well. If he finds you are egoistic and not communicating, he won’t have the urge for communicating with you and problems and issues shall remain unaddressed and unsolved. You don’t want your marriage on the rocks, right? So start sharing with your husband whatever is going on in your mind. Even if your mind is hassle free, sit together at the end of the day and share incidents from your day at work or at home. When you share things with your husband, he finds it easier to open up in front of you and your marriage will be a happy one.
7. Friends are for Life
When you married to your man, you accept every lifestyle of yours. No different for friends. Accept the fact that your husband probably has more friends than you and they will drop by all the time. They are very dear to your husband so be nice to them. Like really nice. When you are friendly with his friends, he will appreciate that quality of yours and will willingly introduce to more and more friends of him.
8. Dates never go out of Fashion
Just because you are married now and have bigger responsibilities, does not mean you will lose out the spark and the romance. On days when you feel the weather is just great, come back home early from work. Or take a day off just to be with your husband. Go out on a romantic date, lunch or movie or dinner as you used to go out earlier. The impression of a quality date stays for long and you will feel the bliss in your marriage. Also, you will feel romantic and loved for days to come. Your husband will thank you for the awesome date and for recreating that magic.
9. “Wow, what a surprise!”
Make your husband go wow with occasional surprises planned for him. Why should only husbands plan surprises for their wives? Even men like to feel pampered once in a while. So girls, don’t wait for some special day. It does not require any special day to profess your love to your husband. Plan a beautiful surprise, romantic or adventurous and woo him all over again. If you feel you are falling short of ideas, you can always resort to Google for your rescue.
10. The Way to a Man’s Heart is through his Stomach
This, you have to agree. Make efforts in cooking meals that your husband loves. When you satisfy his taste buds, he will automatically be at peace. We understand that all women might not be a great cook, most women are working, but let that not deter you from cooking scrumptious meals. Buy a cook book and search for your husband’s favorite dishes. You are free on weekends. Instead of eating out on weekends, stay home and cook for your husband. He will see the amount of effort you are giving and you guys will live happily ever after.
11. Identity is not all about ID Cards
So we stress on the importance of ID cards issued by the government in third world countries. But identity is way beyond those laminated pieces of papers. Girls, just because you are married does not mean you have to be submissive and follow whatever you husband or in laws say. Be who you were before marriage. Remember, guys like strong headed women who have an opinion of their own. That does not mean you will be dominating, but stand up for whatever you feels is right, your husband will respect you even more.
12. Please come out of your Dreams
Yes, women love to dream all the time. About the perfect husband, the perfect in-laws, perfect house on a beach, matching curtains, wooden furniture and what not? But reality is a tad different from your dreams, girls and probably harsh too. So wake up and embrace the beauty of the reality, whatever it has to offer. This is the primary rule of a perfect marriage. When you come to terms with reality and accept the fact that the house, your husband, your in-laws are way different from what you had imagined, that’s when you will have a perfect marriage.
Written by Bisi Adewale
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