Money is good; it is needed at home for almost everything. Expert says more than sixty percent of our income is known to be spent at home. But as good as money is, it can hurt marriages deeply if not handled carefully. Money is known to be one of the commonest causes of conflict in marriage. In fact, in U.S, expert told us that money is the number cause of divorce.
1. Lack of openness: When couples are secretive, when they are not open to each other, if they talkless about money, it will give room for suspicion, ill feelings, attack and counter-attack.
2. Lack of Provision: Failure to provide for one’s family is another way money can cause trouble at home. For a man to have money but fail to provide for his immediate family is criminal, and some wicked and ungodly men do it, this is very bad.
3. Lack of attention: You can be so overwhelm in the pursuit of money that you will get disconnected from your spouse. As soon as you allow money to take first position in your life, then it will start to hurt your marriage. Unfortunately, most men believe all what a woman needs is money, of course they need money, but they want the man first. You can never any wife by giving her money without attending to her. She didn’t marry you because of your money; she married you because of you.
4. Laziness: Failure to work productively with one’s hands to bring money home will definitely lead to serious problem at home. Lazy people want money but are too lazy to do anything, they love to sleep and rest, and they are full of day dreaming and wishful think but cannot lift a finger.
5. Stinginess: Some people are just stingy, they love to get but hate to give. It is not that they do not have, it is only that they’ve made money a tin God. I know a man whose wife must pursue for days before she can collect five thousand naira from him, he has the money he is only stingy, this very wrong and can destroy any home.
6. Lack of Focus: At the beginning of every year, government and organizations do tell the whole world their focus and what it will cost them to do it. They call it ‘budget’. This does guide them throughout the years. You may not be able to draw a comprehensive budget for the year but you must have a focus, you must know where you are going and were you want to be at the end of the year. Couple should set down a goal and how to reach it. Communicate it to each other without which there will be confusion.
7. Extravagancy: This can also lead to serious problem. You become extravagancy if you begin to buy expensive things you don’t really need, when you start to buy things just because others are buying them, when you become to live larger than life lifestyle, living above your income. If only one person is extravagant in marriage the other party will definitely react leading to conflict, if both party are extravagancy, their financial life will react leading to debt and bankruptcy.
Written by Bisi Adewale
Bisi Adewale is a family expert and president of college of marital success, He is an international conference speaker and an author of more than 30 books on marriage and family life, singles, love, sex and intimacy. He is the host of family T.V. program called Family Booster. You can also get his resources at http://totalfamilyresources.com. E-mail: familybooster01@yahoo.com.
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